Well, it’s official. My Thinklings bro and budding novelist Jared is now also on the short list to become a church elder at Bellevue Community Church.
I don’t know if Jared will end up being on the elder board. I know that he is exploring that possibility with humility and prayer.
He’s also one of the that I know. Read his stuff – it’s good.
My daughter Molly, a sophomore in high school, just found out that she is currently ranked twelfth in her class academically. Her class has 600 747 kids in it.
She’s not one to toot her own horn, but she’s smart and she works hard. I’m not surprised. Good job babe!
Tonight I hung out with Robert, one of my buddies from the GAP (Graduates and Professionals) class from church. We met at Java House (which, in my opinion, blows Starbuck$$ away). It was good. Paul normally joins us as well, but he had a conflict tonight.
Robert is an interesting guy, and a computer guy too, so – naturally – there’s a certain Computer Geek jen ne sais quoi that we share. I recognized it from the first few minutes I knew him; we were in the GAP class and I asked (heh heh) for someone to explain the Trinity to me. The explanation that he offered was that Jesus is an “instantiation” of God. Not a bad metaphor, though imperfect as are all pictures of the Trinity. But my ears perked up. Now, “instantiation” may not mean much to you. But if you began snorting in recognition at that term, and if you are currently staring into space as you ponder the UML diagram for the design of the GodHead base class, then you too are a computer guy. You are part of my tribe, my brothah.
I made the mistake of suggesting a chess game (did I mention I’m kind of a geek?). Robert pretty much kicked my tail. That being said, although on the rare occasions that I play chess I usually get clobbered, I do generally take my opponent to “game seven” and make them earn it. Such was the case tonight.
We had a good talk too. I’m glad I have friends I can hang out with – not all men have that. I’m extremely blessed.
I’ve been doing the M’Cheyne one-year Bible reading plan recently. It’s pretty cool. This passage was part of yesterday’s reading, and I think it bears on some of what I was feeling yesterday:
But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself.
Philippians 3:20-21 (ESV)
I guess as children of God we should not be surprised when we feel like we just don’t quite “fit” here. We are truly strangers and aliens.
In fact, it’s better if we don’t get too comfortable. Our real country calls us, and one day we will repatriate it, leaving all this behind.
Cool.
Have you ever felt restless?
I have. And I do. I’m not sure why. I think it’s something that is just part of me, part of how I’m made.
Two of my favorite worship songs are You Alone from Passion ’98 and No Other by David Ruis. There’s an interesting juxtaposition that forms between these two songs. Let me demonstrate:
In You Alone I sing “You have given me more than I could ever have wanted and I want to give you my heart and my soul.” I love that line – I think it’s the story of my life. God’s grace sometimes blows me away. And it’s breathtaking to think of how little I really understand of God’s grace. When I really see the whole story will I even be able to stand, or will I collapse in a pile of thanks? God has blessed me in so many ways: I’ve been so blessed with my wife Jill, and our four children. I simply can’t imagine life without them. It’s indescribable to see my oldest son lead worship. He’s becoming a man so quickly. I”m listening to our second, our oldest daughter, as she absent-mindedly harmonizes to her favorite music mix while she does her homework. It’s beautiful (she’s a worship leader too). Our third child is also a teenager now and she amazes me with her leadership skills and her love for theatre arts, drama, and music. She’s such a dynamo. And then there’s our youngest, our eight year old soccer-star. Seriously, that kid’s amazing at soccer. And his team has a record somewhere in the neighborhood of 45 wins and 5 losses over five seasons. He’s a goal-scoring machine and a talented athlete (and a heck of a funny, good-natured, charming little guy).
And God has given me a great job that I’m good at, for my part. He’s blessed Jill and I to be part of our singles ministry at church. I’ve been so blessed to be part of ministries at our church through the years that have changed my life in ways I can’t explain.
And, of course, and most importantly, I have a Savior who died for me and has taken away all my sins. All of them – gone. And He has given me His Spirit, and the promise of new life, forever in His presence. There’s nothing better than this.
What more could I want?
Yet in No Other I sing “How long until I’m satisfied? I must have more of You!” and I’m reminded of this almost palpable emptiness that I feel sometimes inside. I’m not sure what it is, but I think it’s a longing to be what I was created to be. I feel it when I think about my brokenness and sin, or when I feel anxiety about whether or not I’m a good father, or when I’m wondering if our kids will have the wonderful futures we’ve prayed for. I feel it at work, as I stare into a computer monitor and wonder why I’m doing this work that sometimes seems so meaningless, or when I’m in an elevator alone riding the eight stories up to my floor and I lean back against the back of the elevator and close my eyes, in an effort to gain the motivation to go about the rest of my day. Jill and I talk about our frustrations as we wonder if the singles class is getting anything out of this ministry we’re attempting, or as we juggle the schedules of the class and balance that against the apathy we often encounter there.
It’s so easy to feel like a failure. Because in our fallen state, that’s what we are.
Yet we are more than conquerors too!
And so I feel the tension daily; the deep satisfaction of God’s grace balanced against the deep need of this broken sinner for the homecoming that I’ve been longing for all my Christian life.
Perhaps feeling restless is just part of the deal. And I’m good with that.
“As for me, I shall behold your face in righteousness;
when I awake, I shall be satisfied with your likeness.” – Psalm 17:15
I can’t describe it any better than The Blind Beggar does:
The very useful idea behind The Miniature Earth is to reduce the world’s population to a community of only 100 people, while keeping statistics the same. The effect enables us to see the differences on our planet with clarity, and perhaps consider how our actions impact humanity.
It is only a few minutes long and well worth a look. Praying you will, in the project’s final words, “Appreciate what you have. And do your best for a better world.”
Tonight I went to CVS to buy some dental floss.
I also came this close to buying the CD Incense and Peppermints from the Strawberry Alarm Clock.
It was only four bucks. And it occurred to me that I may never have another chance to pick up such great tracks as Rainy Day Mushroom Pillow or Birds in my Tree. It also features that great hippy-skat classic, Good Morning Starshine.
The earth says hello!
I, wisely, decided to just pay for my dental floss and go.
Amy Sherman over at Common Grounds has a great post on the “Gift of Agitation”.
John Piper, in his book, A Hunger for God, has very helpfully reminded us of what the appropriate posture of the Church should be. It is the posture of the longing Bride, waiting at the altar for the appearing of the bridegroom. She is tapping her foot and glancing at her watch. The bride is filled with a “holy discontent” over the absence of her Bridegroom and is busy crying out “Maranatha! Maranatha! Come Lord Jesus!” The New Testament church exhibited this posture, because it was a persecuted church. Christians were intimately acquainted with suffering and poverty. They were eager for Christ to consummate His Kingdom, because they knew that things on earth were not the way they were supposed to be.
Unfortunately, this agitated posture is not the posture of the typical American congregation. We do not long fervently for the consummation of Christ’s Kingdom because we’re really rather happy just the way things are. American abundance and affluence anesthetize us. We are comfortable. We are not crying out night and day for God to bring justice on earth. We forget to shout, Maranatha!
Convicting. And this contentment with the way things are is something that I have to fight all the time.
Of course, go and read the whole thing.
[Hat tip: Jared]
This guy has written a treatise on manhood over at Thinklings, for what it’s worth.
Although how manly can a guy be who’s nickname is “De” and who’s previous nicknme was “Jewel”. 😉