As some of you may know, I’ve been working on a novel, off and on, for quite awhile. Lately it’s been more “off” than “on” but I’ve been feeling more and more like I need to get back to it.
The working title of this piece of fiction is Twenty Three Notes. I don’t have any thoughts of being published at this time. I know, mainly from walking through this process with Jared, how hard it is even for good writers to get published, let alone a scruff like me. But the whole point has always been to finish it and let whatever happens after that happen, even if it’s nothing.
I’ve written a Prelude, chapters 1 through 5, bits of chapter 6, 8, 12, and the Postlude. Chapter six has been the sticking point. I began writing it and just stalled. The last thing I wrote in it was a big, bold, disgusted “REWRITE THIS” at the top of the first page of the chapter.
Well, I pulled chapter six out this morning on the bus and began to read it. One of the conversations in it touched me and I started crying. Well, not “crying”, per se, but my eyes misted up. I’m realizing that there is some good in this chapter. Either that or maybe it’s just something I ate this morning 🙂 – in any event, it got to me. I think I’ll keep it. The fact that it was dialog that got to me was heartening, because good dialog is the absolute hardest part to write, for me anyway.
I also read the Postlude. Yeah, I started crying after reading that too. I realize that this isn’t about getting published or even really about anyone else ever liking this novel. It’s about finishing it, and in some way being able to communicate what’s in my heart, what I think God has put in my heart, that I’ve longed to communicate but have never been able to verbalize. Maybe now I can, through the fictional lives of these characters that I’ve created.
I hope I can get moving again on this. I need to.